Roxanne Narrating


Today is the day the triplets are going to advance from infancy to toddlerhood.
And quite honestly, it is very relieving. Swaddled up in a knit pink blanket, I took each one to the birthday cake. I asked Leighton if he wanted to bring any of the girls to the cake but he just hung his head and mumbled no. Somethings odd about him lately. I just can't put my finger on it.


It would be pointless to show you three pictures of each girl growing up when they look so much alike, so I'll just show how they each turned out.


The first to grow up is Madeline, or Lynn. She grew up with long black hair, just like her daddy. She loves the color Lilac and will only drink organic milk and baby squash, which costs more than regular food. Do we have a future diva on our hands? I guess time will only tell....


The next to grow up was Alice, who has short black hair and big black eyes.
She definitely takes after Leighton. She fusses a lot but is an all around good girl.
She is a little different though.....Always talking to herself and eating grubs out of the neighbors garden. *sigh*


And last but certainly not least, is momma's baby girl, Belinda. She has long brown hair just like yours truly and big violet eyes. She is always pulling on my leg for attention and I always give it to her. How can you resist that face?

After growing the triplets up I thought I would have some time for some R&R .
Well guess what?

I was wrong.


The triplets needed more attention than ever. Leighton helped but was always moping around, steaming inside about an unknown conundrum. This makes me sad. I hope nothings wrong.....


Brian was as indifferent as always. I didn't even get the occasional "I love you mom" or "Bye mom" when he left anymore. All the happiness the girls put into my heart would be drained when I saw his lifeless eyes and limp features. He would groan and mumble when I asked him to do something or tell me how his day went.


One day Leighton had had enough. He hated being snuffed by someone.
And especially by his own flesh and blood.

Leighton: "Ok Brian....I can't take it anymore! What the he-- What's wrong with you, son?"

*Grumble*

Leighton: "GOD BRIAN! SHAPE UP OR...OR I'M GONNA MAKE YOU......"

Leighton couldn't think of any threat that would really scare our son.
Instead Brian walked away, knowing full well he possessed even more power than he had before. It sucked knowing he had us in the palm of his hand spinning us around like a yo-yo. *Heavy sigh*


Sam has been invaluable to us helping with the triplets. He tickles, snuggles and nuzzles them and all around is proving a great step-brother. He is always talking about his girlfriend Bella to. Bella this and Bella that. His Bella. And when she comes over to our house his eyes take on a whole new realm of meaning.

*sighs again* Young love is a sweet thing.


As for my own life, its good. I'm finally making my way up the culinary career ladder. Oregano and souffle are common words where I work and I feel most content when I smell the beautiful culinary creations of my higher ups.
Sometimes I feel sad that I haven't made my dreams come true and my elder years are approaching but when I look in my kids faces I know I made the right choice.

I didn't say it's not hard though.


On a sunny Tuesday, Brian and Sammy were away at school and I decided to treat me and the hubby to a little lunch. A little Stu surprise can be romantic, right?
Lately things have been strained between us. Maybe it was the triplets or something else? Something darker possibly? Oh, maybe I'm just paranoid.

Roxanne: "Honey, the stews done. Wanna eat it while the girls are asleep? I put eggplants in it because I know how you like your purple veggies......honey you there?"

Leighton was on the porch and when I called out he looked me in the eyes, the first time he had done that in a long, long time. They were bloodshot and full of unshielded agony. Suddenly he jumped up and locked me in an embrace.
And just as quickly he let me go. I wanted him to hold me again like that.

But instead he walked away, into the nursery.


Leighton: "One of the girls is crying...."

But I didn't hear anything.

And then I imagined everything would fall perfectly into place.
That the thing on Leighton's mind was just a harmless thing like what Birthday gift he was going to get me and how he would surprise me with a cake with icing bells and whistles. And I imagines little Brian helping me with the groceries or saying "I love you" just once, so I would know that I wasn't a complete and utter failure of a mother. And I imagined my girls growing up and playing with barbies until they were 30, not getting into boy drama until the late 70's.

But that was just imagining.

The real world was much different.

Leighton Narrating


Now, you probably think I'm a jerk for doing all this to my wife.
Or you might think I'm some other things that I won't even get into.

And you know what, your absolutely right.

In the past, I made far less mistakes. And the ones that I did make were small and basically meaningless like forgetting to order my hamburger with extra pickles.
Now I made them left and right, every where I went I messed something up in a bigger way than you could imagine.

Now you may be wondering why I had to snuff my gorgeous, kind, smart and otherwise perfect wife. Well, in some part of my mind I knew that the baby I would eventually make with the Sunset Seven heiress would be found out by my real wife, who I loved more than life itself. And at that point she would leave me almost surely. Might as well make it easier for her by acting like a a--.

But I knew this was stupid, something desperate men thought about in desperate situations. The baby wasn't even here yet. I had officially done nothing wrong. There was still hope. Just .01 percent of it but it was still there regardless. I needed anything I got. And that meant my wife.


She was rocking Alice to sleep. I tapped her on the shoulder.
It had been more than a long time since we had held hands. Her dainty,
fragile hands in my big hands that had done so much bad in life.
Hers were perfect, they had never done bad in life. It was the
opposite that tore us apart. And yet here we were gazing into each others eyes,
hers full of lovely confusion and ancient sadness.

I never wanted to hurt her again. I had to tell her so she would know.
And it was a toss-up what would happen from there.

Leighton: "Rox.....I have hurt you so much and there's absolutely no excuse for that. I need you more than water and air. You are my life. You are the reason God put me on this world. You are the reason that I have the most beautiful children in the world. I just need to tell you something. And it will hurt you again."


Her eyes slimmed down and I could see open skepticism.

Roxanne: "Well....what is it?"

She had always had a hot temper and it was revealing itself again.
I had the urge to hold her face and kiss it and wipe the tears away.
I had to come clean. I opened my mouth.


Belinda: "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH"
MOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMA!"

Belinda's scream woke all the other girls. I could tell this conversation was going to be put on hold. I was half relieved half mortified. Is this what they called
"saved by the bell" I sure didn't feel saved.

All I can tell is that this is going to be a long ride until the day I die.